Last week, we noted how Shakespeare’s romantic comedies typically end in marriage, often in multiple marriages. Measure for Measure does its best to marry off the entire cast in Act 5, from Duke Vincentio at the top of the social ladder to a pregnant prostitute at the other, even if the Duke’s proposal is left hanging as the play ends. In this, Shakespeare is not necessarily expressing his own opinion of marriage but is following the conventions of New Comedy, which was actually anything but new even in his time, going back to the Greek comedies of Menander, now mostly lost, and the Roman comedies of Plautus and Terence. The formula of New Comedy is expressed in the line from
Youngster here, living in the “epidemic of loneliness,” as I’ve seen it refereed to as. Me and some some of my courted contemporaries have discussed this topic, with less nuance and intricacy, many times recently. I initially suspected interconnectedness via social media and the internet was the culprit: as our world became more interconnected, I believed, and still do, to some extent, that interconnection drove us, as young people, farther apart: why talk to the gal sitting next to you at the bar when you can chat up women from corners and regions beyond your grasp? But, my contemporaries pointed out, the continuous social unrest, which surrounds us in the post 9/11 world, drives us to cynicism and hesitations about the future, it’s viability; it’s not uncommon at all for people my age to talk about whether it’s worth it or not to invest in a future or not. That’s the actual rhetoric we use; is it worth it to save money, buy a home, buy a new car or otherwise stick to conventional, acceptable means for stimulating the economy with constant news articles and social media posts highlighting potential economic collapse, war and violence, political corruption, and perpetual cries to cancel this company, boycott that company, accept this movement, abandon that one. It’s hard enough to keep up with all of the aforementioned movements and ideals, let alone take them on with a partner, someone else’s potential perspectives and beliefs.
To respond to your newsletter, I think your point about satire being the counter-genre to romance is both witty and truthy, as former Supreme Court Justice David Souter would call such statement. What my contemporaries, this time including social media and my degenerate friends, and I would conclude is that it’s much easier to turn to humor, satire and other mediums that provide comfort that both critique and uphold the disheveled feelings and burdens we carry with us than to uphold previous social norms . That is, it’s easier to say ‘fuck it, i’d rather be alone and deal with the cynicism of the world than deal with my own cynicism(s) AND YOURS!’ I supposed the validity of that notion rests on a measure on, say, the social unrest of the 1960s, or other time periods of heightened social unrest, compared to the social unrest of the post 9/11 world. A BW mentor of mine once said “when we compare we all lose.”
To affirm a lesser important, yet, equally impactful, piece of advice you offered, I’ve found my Penelope, and I intend on holding onto her as long as I’m able. I feel beyond fortunate that I’ve found a companion to figure this life-thing out with. What that say about the hope for marriage and companion type love, I don’t feel confident to comment on. I feel do confident in saying it probably won’t look like it previously has. I think with the socially acceptable expansion of companionship and relationships, polygamy and hookups to name a few, I think we’re looking at a selfish and individualistic view of relationships that will dominate my generation. That description of such views or beliefs in relationships is not meant as a judgement of critique of relationships, rather an observation.
What a rich, deeply thought-out, deeply felt comment, Cole! My thanks for taking so much trouble. Important things first: congratulations on finding your Penelope! I wish you the best of luck and hope it works out.
There is so much in your comment that I'm hard put where to begin, but, to be clear, I am not negative about your generation--quite the contrary. You describe it as a very guarded, self-protective generation, often barricaded behind the distancing of the Internet, behind a cynical pose, and so on. But you have good reason for that--as you explain, the world you have come of age in is so disrupted, so dangerous, so full of hate and corruption, that you are wary not just of romance but of any idealistic plans for the future. I find that very sad, but do not criticize it because you are not neurotic, not snowflakes--you have good reason for anxiety.
In a way, this coming Friday's newsletter addresses some of that. The satire-romance polarity is more than a generic distinction: it's a contrast of attitudes, of visions. Thing is, they're Contraries--both are true at once. And that doubleness describes my own personality and viewpoint. I am at once dark-minded and idealistic. Mind you, any full integration of the opposites is more than human, so when I'm not up to the challenge, in my neurotic moments, I'm just bipolar, swinging back and forth. But I do think that some kind of yin-yang balance can be approximated in this world. I think that's true in romance as well. More people are living alone, but people still yearn for what the word "romance" signifies. Oh, yeah, including me. Here I am at 73, still having romantic drama in my life, good and bad. Anyway, your letter helped me to understand both you and your generation better, and I like being a student as well as a teacher. So, my thanks. I'm honored as always that you read the newsletter. Best, Mike
Thank YOU, for the reply. I think you’re right, there’s some sort of balance that can be approximated between the two, certainly in romance as well. What drives the so called epidemic of loneliness we’re living through is up for debate. What I think is certain, though, is the yearning sentiment you expressed. I think that feeling will jerk us around on a leash far past whenever, if ever, it’s figured out why we yearn for that sentiment of romance. In some ways, it feels like an addition to the tired saying, ‘the only things certain in life are taxes and death.’ I’d throw in “romantic drama,” as you call it, in there as well. Would you? Is our yearning for romance, at least the sentiment of it, as certain as death and taxes? Or, could enough interrogation into the subject delight the feeling into satisfaction?
I’ve found myself in a silo of sadness at the thought. I’ll rest the interrogation for now and return to satire. I’ll call that balance.
Youngster here, living in the “epidemic of loneliness,” as I’ve seen it refereed to as. Me and some some of my courted contemporaries have discussed this topic, with less nuance and intricacy, many times recently. I initially suspected interconnectedness via social media and the internet was the culprit: as our world became more interconnected, I believed, and still do, to some extent, that interconnection drove us, as young people, farther apart: why talk to the gal sitting next to you at the bar when you can chat up women from corners and regions beyond your grasp? But, my contemporaries pointed out, the continuous social unrest, which surrounds us in the post 9/11 world, drives us to cynicism and hesitations about the future, it’s viability; it’s not uncommon at all for people my age to talk about whether it’s worth it or not to invest in a future or not. That’s the actual rhetoric we use; is it worth it to save money, buy a home, buy a new car or otherwise stick to conventional, acceptable means for stimulating the economy with constant news articles and social media posts highlighting potential economic collapse, war and violence, political corruption, and perpetual cries to cancel this company, boycott that company, accept this movement, abandon that one. It’s hard enough to keep up with all of the aforementioned movements and ideals, let alone take them on with a partner, someone else’s potential perspectives and beliefs.
To respond to your newsletter, I think your point about satire being the counter-genre to romance is both witty and truthy, as former Supreme Court Justice David Souter would call such statement. What my contemporaries, this time including social media and my degenerate friends, and I would conclude is that it’s much easier to turn to humor, satire and other mediums that provide comfort that both critique and uphold the disheveled feelings and burdens we carry with us than to uphold previous social norms . That is, it’s easier to say ‘fuck it, i’d rather be alone and deal with the cynicism of the world than deal with my own cynicism(s) AND YOURS!’ I supposed the validity of that notion rests on a measure on, say, the social unrest of the 1960s, or other time periods of heightened social unrest, compared to the social unrest of the post 9/11 world. A BW mentor of mine once said “when we compare we all lose.”
To affirm a lesser important, yet, equally impactful, piece of advice you offered, I’ve found my Penelope, and I intend on holding onto her as long as I’m able. I feel beyond fortunate that I’ve found a companion to figure this life-thing out with. What that say about the hope for marriage and companion type love, I don’t feel confident to comment on. I feel do confident in saying it probably won’t look like it previously has. I think with the socially acceptable expansion of companionship and relationships, polygamy and hookups to name a few, I think we’re looking at a selfish and individualistic view of relationships that will dominate my generation. That description of such views or beliefs in relationships is not meant as a judgement of critique of relationships, rather an observation.
What a wonderful newsletter topic!
What a rich, deeply thought-out, deeply felt comment, Cole! My thanks for taking so much trouble. Important things first: congratulations on finding your Penelope! I wish you the best of luck and hope it works out.
There is so much in your comment that I'm hard put where to begin, but, to be clear, I am not negative about your generation--quite the contrary. You describe it as a very guarded, self-protective generation, often barricaded behind the distancing of the Internet, behind a cynical pose, and so on. But you have good reason for that--as you explain, the world you have come of age in is so disrupted, so dangerous, so full of hate and corruption, that you are wary not just of romance but of any idealistic plans for the future. I find that very sad, but do not criticize it because you are not neurotic, not snowflakes--you have good reason for anxiety.
In a way, this coming Friday's newsletter addresses some of that. The satire-romance polarity is more than a generic distinction: it's a contrast of attitudes, of visions. Thing is, they're Contraries--both are true at once. And that doubleness describes my own personality and viewpoint. I am at once dark-minded and idealistic. Mind you, any full integration of the opposites is more than human, so when I'm not up to the challenge, in my neurotic moments, I'm just bipolar, swinging back and forth. But I do think that some kind of yin-yang balance can be approximated in this world. I think that's true in romance as well. More people are living alone, but people still yearn for what the word "romance" signifies. Oh, yeah, including me. Here I am at 73, still having romantic drama in my life, good and bad. Anyway, your letter helped me to understand both you and your generation better, and I like being a student as well as a teacher. So, my thanks. I'm honored as always that you read the newsletter. Best, Mike
Thank YOU, for the reply. I think you’re right, there’s some sort of balance that can be approximated between the two, certainly in romance as well. What drives the so called epidemic of loneliness we’re living through is up for debate. What I think is certain, though, is the yearning sentiment you expressed. I think that feeling will jerk us around on a leash far past whenever, if ever, it’s figured out why we yearn for that sentiment of romance. In some ways, it feels like an addition to the tired saying, ‘the only things certain in life are taxes and death.’ I’d throw in “romantic drama,” as you call it, in there as well. Would you? Is our yearning for romance, at least the sentiment of it, as certain as death and taxes? Or, could enough interrogation into the subject delight the feeling into satisfaction?
I’ve found myself in a silo of sadness at the thought. I’ll rest the interrogation for now and return to satire. I’ll call that balance.
Cheers,
Cole